i've been putting off my annual long term cancer follow-up stuff (inadvertently mostly sort of) since november. these past two weeks i finally got most of my shit together: ekg, echo, bone scan, blood work (thyroid/hormones), mri breast scan.
bone scan was short and not very exciting but it revealed that i've got some pre-osteoporosis in my hips that was almost certainly caused by the prednisone i had during chemo, and maybe the radiation too. i was instructed by my rn to take a calcium supplement to which i replied, 'um yeah, been doing that...could this possibly explain the hip pain i've been having since 2001?' 'huh. let me talk to your onc and get back to you on that one.' sure enough, two days later: 'you really should have been taking supplements since you finished treatment as the drugs probably interfered with your bone formation. calcium supplements won't do much at this point. and the pain may be due to a fracture. but we can't really help you. you should see a specialist.' erm, okaaaay. 'so could this also be related to the other issues i'm having: crazy hair loss, wonky periods, ridiculous need for sleep, bruising, etc etc etc? hormones? thyroid? MENOPAUSE? are there other not-quite-thirty-year-olds in my cohort in MENOPAUSE?' 'well yeah, you certainly may be entering menopause.' *exploding head noise*
and now: boobies! since i epically failed at my last mri boob scan (in that i got halfway in the tube, freaked, and bolted) i came prepared on wednesday night. in other words, i brought danny and a healthy dose of xanax. apparently i completed it and stumbled out high as a kite (where i remained from 8pm until roughly noon the next day). i insisted to mike that indian food and mediterranean food were the same (they both have chicken and rice) and then fell asleep at the japanese restaurant that i insisted we go to. parker tells me that i got her up, packed her lunch and brought her to school the next morning though i have only her word to go on. *oops* anyway, results to follow.
i've spent the last few months reading over my health after therapy paperwork and mourning the loss of my youth. not in a whining and feeling sorry for myself way (though i've had my moments) but in a resenting not being better prepared for this shit way. upon completing treatment my doctors said: 'yay! you survived! now go! enjoy your awesome cancer free life!' when they should have said: 'yay! you survived! now go! enjoy your awesome cancer free life! and keep in mind that you may get another cancer later! and also you'll likely suffer thyroid problems! and reproductive issues! and maybe heart problems!' and so forth... instead it's felt like crazy making. 'hmm... hip problems? nope, never heard of that one.' until suddenly ten years later they reveal that osteoporosis is sorta common. 'noooo, we have no idea why you might feel a little foggy in the brain region. must be unrelated.' and yet, every single cancer survivor i've ever spoken to mentions the same thing. i'm not a stupid broken child. i'm an almost 30 year old mother. with a degree. and a house. and a business. and the right to know what i can potentially expect.
ekg and echo were uneventful though i brought renzo with me and he asked the techs a bajillion questions. i'm assuming that since i've heard no news my heart is still beating and at fairly regular intervals.
and now: boobies! since i epically failed at my last mri boob scan (in that i got halfway in the tube, freaked, and bolted) i came prepared on wednesday night. in other words, i brought danny and a healthy dose of xanax. apparently i completed it and stumbled out high as a kite (where i remained from 8pm until roughly noon the next day). i insisted to mike that indian food and mediterranean food were the same (they both have chicken and rice) and then fell asleep at the japanese restaurant that i insisted we go to. parker tells me that i got her up, packed her lunch and brought her to school the next morning though i have only her word to go on. *oops* anyway, results to follow.
i've spent the last few months reading over my health after therapy paperwork and mourning the loss of my youth. not in a whining and feeling sorry for myself way (though i've had my moments) but in a resenting not being better prepared for this shit way. upon completing treatment my doctors said: 'yay! you survived! now go! enjoy your awesome cancer free life!' when they should have said: 'yay! you survived! now go! enjoy your awesome cancer free life! and keep in mind that you may get another cancer later! and also you'll likely suffer thyroid problems! and reproductive issues! and maybe heart problems!' and so forth... instead it's felt like crazy making. 'hmm... hip problems? nope, never heard of that one.' until suddenly ten years later they reveal that osteoporosis is sorta common. 'noooo, we have no idea why you might feel a little foggy in the brain region. must be unrelated.' and yet, every single cancer survivor i've ever spoken to mentions the same thing. i'm not a stupid broken child. i'm an almost 30 year old mother. with a degree. and a house. and a business. and the right to know what i can potentially expect.
